Singapore Day 1

Spoke to a guy today and he told me that the place I was wandering around (and having a beer) in last night is one of the most poverty stricken areas in town. Little India.


The thing is that at no time did I even feel remotely threatened. Anyway.
No sleep last night as the recent news and jet lag conspired against me and I eventually got to sleep after 7 this morning. Woke up feeling woozy about 11 but decided to go out in the daylight and continue the exploration. I am falling in love with the place. After all the press about the laws here regarding litter, chewing gum etc I was expecting a little bit of a repeat performance of Dubai but I am happy to say that it is not like that at all. Bustling would be a good adjective. On the plane on the way in, there was an announcement that anybody trying to bring drugs into the country will get the death sentence. Not may, will. I would like to report that queues for the toilets all of a sudden built up but sadly that wasn't the case.
It was quite overcast and walking 50 yards the sweat started dripping. It brought a conundrum to me. If I wore the same T-shirt ad infinitum in these conditions would it eventually rot? I have a feeling that because of the salt in the sweat, it would act as a kind of preservative. The only conclusion that I could come to was that it would snap or shatter or something like that. A couple of images close to the hotel.

So, having forgotten to bring the cable for my camera I went to this 6 storey huge building full of electronics shops. There must have been hundreds of them. Couldnt find one so I had to buy some other stuff which I have just about got the hang of.
I fancied some curry so I went back to a little unassuming bar/restaurant sandwiched between a backpackers' hostel and a Thai massage place and had ahem a few beers and some Indian food. I can safely say that it was the nicest that I have had. Fantastic. I had eaten half of it before I thought of photographing it so I didn't. To round off the evening, I thought, when in Singapore, do what the Singaporeans do.



That's right, they drink Singapore Slings out of jam jars
I think i may spend more time here than I originally intended. Sod Bangkok.

Dubai to Singapore

I had still not really got used to the time difference so getting up at 6am to go to the airport didn't make me best pleased. Once there, it is amazingly efficient to check in but once through security an absolute nightmare. The crowds of people wandering aimlessly, bumping into each other and getting in one's way. I felt Fawltyesque. My normal routine when travelling for leisure purposes is to have a small libation prior to boarding the plane to oil the wheels as it were. Of course this is not possible in Dubai, you can only get a drink at a hotel where there is a b in the name. Had a water and an orange juice, bought a couple of books and then wandered towards the gate. My last 15 dirhams were spent on a really good coffee. As an aside, do you think that whoever wrote the Pink Panther tune came from the UAE? Dirham, dirham, dirham dirham dirham. It's either that or Durham. My flights are with Emirates and I have been knocked out by them. Leg room, on time and the food in economy is quite nice. Did you hear that at the back? The food in economy is quite nice. The staff are friendly and helpful, good grief I sound like an advert. Whilst on the subject I would like to give Jason a mention, the guy who sorted out the flights for me. Incredibly helpful, over and above the call of duty, an Aussie though, destined to be desperately disappointed when the Ashes are returned to their rightful place. Contact me if you would like his details. Anyway, I digress. The plane wasn't that full and there was a bit of shuffling about which kind of suited me because I got 3 seats to myself. However there were 3 brothers in the middle bit who had very plummy english accents. They also spoke Arabic. Their parents were in front of them and completely ignored their outrageously bad behaviour. To cut a long story short, I managed to get a bit of kip which is unusual for me on a plane but I kept getting woken up by these creatures. As we came in to land I gave it to them, in the nicest possible way of course. Something along the lines of 'You lot are obviously intelligent and articulate so why dont you have any respect for anyone'. I was trying to get a reaction from the parents but no, I nearly got a round of applause though. Lots of smiles from the adjacent passengers. Got to Singapore about 9pm. 30 degrees and humid. Got a cab, dumped the stuff and then did a bit of exploration. Looks like a nice place to be. The t-shirt discussion can wait for later.

Dubai, Dubai wipe the tear baby dear from your eye

Dubai is not something that I am going to dwell on. I was feeling dreadful and received some devastating news while I was there. It was far too hot to venture out during the day and is just about the most soulless place I think that I have ever visited. I didn't even bother taking pictures of the modern urban landscape because it was just too depressing. I believe that suicidal thoughts often accompany the first few days of a trip like this so I shall say no more. £6 a pint anyone? That is when you can get one. I went to a place called the Mall of the Emirates which is approximately the size of Mansfield. Despite the impression that everything is up to date, the whole hotel/shopping experience was tooth-grindingly frustrating in it's inefficiency. On the plus side, cabs are cheap.
I did however come up with something to keep me occupied during the trip. I am writing a screenplay tentatively called Collydog Billionaire. It's about a dog who, during his breaks from rounding up sheep writes a basic computer operating system in his kennel. He then goes on to create one of the largest corporations in the world and becomes a major philanthropist. I think it could be a winner. What a dog would do with all those stamps is a different issue, lick them I suppose.

You don't sing me vole songs any more.

This is not really a travel related post but one that may spark something in the deepest, most sinister recesses of your mind.

The other night, I had two dear friends round and happened to come across the monumental realisation that love was an anagram of vole. Once mentioned, this developed into something very silly indeed. We sat there thinking of song lyrics and substituting the word vole whenever the love word came up. I can't really remember such an extended period of giggling. One of my friends then posted the concept on Tubeface or something similar and the ideas accelerated. There are many contenders but I am still very fond of Vole potion number 9.
Believe me, we went through the lot, starting with 'Vole vole me do', I can't stop voling you?? We touched on films. Vole Story anyone? The marvellous thing about it was the laughter. That kind of thing doesn't happen very often. Something to be treasured.

Comments?

Canada

Very little that I wish to report from Canada because it`s none of your business but I may post a few pictures.

This has been my home for the last fortnight. Jolly nice it has been as well.

This is a very silly cat.



I`m sure that I will pick this blogging business up after a while and will become a little bit more articulate but ciao for now.